Why God is Beyond My Understanding

I was lying in my bed before I was going to go to bed a few nights ago and right before I fell asleep a question hit my brain. It seems like a rather simple question, but it still made me think a lot. Unfortunately, I lost sleep but I can get it back haha. The question is: Why does God do it better than me? How does it come about that even when I “know”  I have the situation all handled he will show me something I need to change? Why do I fight against what he tells me to do and attempt to make a path of my own (when I know he’s right)? These were some of the questions that went through my mind and after a long time thinking and reflecting on Scriptures I think I got a decent handle on it.

            So the first thing I realized is that God understands the whole situation whilst I do not. I mostly just see how the situation can benefit myself and I can’t really comprehend how much things affect others. When I make a decision, I only see the immediate effects of my decision. I can’t see how it truly affects others because I am not those people. I can’t feel their hurt and I can’t understand their pain. God does. He knows all of us by name and he knows our deepest thoughts. He knows everything about us. His understanding of a situation cannot be measured and that is why it should be in his hands. It really comes down to the fact that he is God and I am not. Who am I, that the Lord of all the Earth would care to know my name? As Steven Curtis Chapman says in his song “God is God”,

God is God and I am not 
I can only see a part of the picture He’s painting 
God is God and I am man 
So I’ll never understand it all 
For only God is God

It is so true. There are times where I forget the amazing things God has done for me and I really just want to do it on my own. I forget that his glory cannot be measured and his mercies will never end. Everything he has done for me indicates one thing… that I need to trust him and follow his direction. Something he may ask me to do or that he does may not seem like the best thing for me, but he knows what is best for me. He knows what I truly need. An example of this was when I broke my wrist playing soccer my sophomore year of high school. I was idolizing soccer before him and he was showing me that. Soccer was my life… I was about to be called up to the varsity of one of the powerhouses in my state. It was everything to me. I was so ticked off when it happened… I asked God over and over again why did you do this to me? It was my big break, it was my golden chance… yet today I see why he did it. I know that if that injury had never happened, I would not be who I am today. My faith in God would not be as strong, and I would probably be playing soccer at some college instead of being at the university I am at today. I know that his plan at the time didn’t seem the best for me but as I look back I know it was exactly the wake-up call that I needed in my life. I wish he had figured out a different way to tell me haha, but I won’t question how he did it. Essentially, God understands the big picture and we don’t… so we should give the control to the one who knows what is best for us and those around us.

I also thought about why do I fight God even when I know it’s the right thing to do? I felt like I understand the answer, but it was still good to go back to the basics. The reason why we fight God is because we as humans are naturally sinful. Our tendency is to sin and not doing what God says definitely fits into that description. Romans 3:10-12 says, As it is written:“There is no one righteous, not even one;there is no one who understands; there is no one who seeks God. All have turned away, they have together become worthless; there is no one who does good, not even one.” Let’s not beat around the bush here guys… sin often feels good to us. It feels good to break rules and stuff like that… now the consequences don’t feel good. They feel bad, but a lot of times sin indeed feels good. We reject God because we want to fulfill the desires of our sinful nature.

 So for example, let’s say you feel like you hear God’s voice telling you not to date a girl (or vice versa) because they’re a non-Christian, and don’t know anything about God. They are completely into our culture and have those worldly desires. You may think to yourself they are a funny, attractive and simply the perfect person for me; however, you don’t see the conflict that could be down the road. You both will most likely have a ton of conflict because that other person won’t see things through the lens that you do. They could draw you farther away from God and your growth in God would be stunted. What happens when you get married? How are you going to agree on a budget if you are barely hanging on and they disagree with you tithing? How are you going to raise your kids religiously and morally when the parents are from two completely different backgrounds? They’ll be hearing certain stuff from you and certain stuff from your spouse… how are they going to make decisions? These are all reasons why God wants us to be married to a Christian. So let’s say we don’t date this person. What if a little while later another girl comes into our life… she may not as attractive or as funny but she has a heart for the Lord. There will be problems down the road because there are with any relationship, but the problems that come with marrying a non-Christian are erased. This example may not be quite the best, but I think everyone understands the principle.

Well, I hope this pushes you to ponder these questions even more. They seem like really obvious answers, but I know the more I thought about them the more I remembered/learned about God. We always think we know the basics… but do we really? I honestly feel like we can never learn enough about God because the knowledge of God is immeasurable and we always have to go back to the basic questions of our faith and answer them again. That will encourage growth because we will see things in the Bible we hadn’t seen before, understand concepts, and that leads to a closer walk with Christ. A personal relationship with Jesus is only good if we striving to understand him more and more because he saved us. He died on a cross so that you and me only have to believe in him to have everlasting life in paradise with him. If there is ANYTHING we should be spending our time on it is getting to know him more. We don’t have to earn our salvation by works or knowledge of Christ, but we do it because we love him and want to know him more. That’s that 🙂

 

P.S. I’ve had an awesome Christmas break… and it’s going to be done in just one more week. I love being home and seeing my friends here but I can’t wait to see my college friends and more floor again!      

Growing in God pt. 2 Prayer

So, there are so many different ways to approach prayer and I really think it is one of the harder things to do in the Christian walk. I’ve always prayed a lot to God but I didn’t really think about how I was doing it. Then, I had an assignment in my Christian Thought (Theology class) at college and the point of the assignment was to grow in one area, focus on it for a week, write about it, and continue to grow in that area. I feel like it is a good description of prayer… so I’ll just post my assignment. I feel like it will help you understand prayer more because it certainly helped me to deepen what I feel is an already strong relationship with God. The point is that you can never grow in God enough and I know that I just want to know God more and more. I want to know him more, I want to see his face, and I want him to be the most important part of all of me. Anyways, read on…

 

“I chose the area of prayer because I knew that this was something that I could definitely improve in. When I read this assignment for the very first time the Lord convicted me and I realized that I needed to improve how I pray. Honestly, I can pray well when I’m in a group but I find it quite a bit harder to pray when I am alone. When I understood that was the direction that God was pushing me in I wasn’t very surprised and I decided to obey his instructions to improve this area of my spiritual life.

The way I chose to respond to this assignment was in meekness and I started it with prayer of course! I decided that I was going to let God work whatever he wanted in my life that week and that I would make time for whatever God wanted me to do to bring about improvement in this area. I understood that I couldn’t do any of this on my own and I was only going to become closer to God in prayer if I let him teach me.  I also decided that I would pray for 10 minutes at least once every day. One of my goals for the week was that I was going to pray before I got into a mode of desperation. In the chapter, it pointed out that a lot of times we associate praying with desperation, and an example of that was the Hail Mary. The Hail Mary is a desperate heave to the end zone in hopes that a miracle should happen; therefore, I vowed to pray before I got to that point. That’s how I wanted to respond to this challenge.

            On the first day of the week, Monday, I decided to start my prayer out by just listening to God for two minutes and not saying anything. To tell the truth, I really didn’t hear anything from God for those first few minutes and so I moved on in the prayer. For the next few minutes or so I thanked God for all the blessings he has given me. My family, my friends, the fact that I can attend this great university and countless other things I have been blessed with. After that, I brought my prayer requests to God and explained to him what was on my heart. One of the specific ones was my grandmother because she had been admitted into the hospital because of severe dehydration the night before. I was very nervous because she is eighty years old and my mother said that she was pretty out of it that night. I prayed to God and asked him to heal her and make it so she could go back home. My grandpa was also harvesting apples so it was a prayer for him that he would be able to focus on the harvest and not worry about my grandma. I spent just a few minutes basking in the reassurance I felt that everything would be okay. Those are the moments where you don’t do anything at all and you just have to remember that he is God. He has control over everything and will put everything in its right place. So while it was a rough beginning I felt like the prayer time ended really well.

            On Tuesday, I decided to do it a different way and started out with my prayer requests. When my mom had talked to me earlier in the day it sounded like my grandma was doing a little better, but she still couldn’t walk around and was still feeling dehydrated. At this point, I felt like she was definitely doing better but I decided I would just pray for her that day and nothing else. The combination of praying on both Monday and Tuesday just really made me peaceful about the whole situation. If I hadn’t set this time to pray aside for this project I know that I would’ve felt a lot more stressed out but with the time I spent in prayer it brought about in me much more trust in God’s plan.

            With the last prayer session in mind, on Wednesday my goal was to really be able to listen to God speak to me during prayer. So once again, I started my prayer time just not saying anything and keeping my ears completely open to whatever God was trying to tell me. Thankfully, it went a lot better than it did on Monday! This time when I was listening God told me that I needed to continue to seek him and pursue him. I feel like I do a pretty good job of learning more about God and following him but I will admit that my fire for him was dying a little. I was just losing motivation to pursue him with all my heart and during that prayer I was convicted to surrender all of myself to him again. Not just parts of me, but all of me. This really taught me that prayer isn’t just about part of me or part of my struggles… prayer is about all of me. God cares about all my struggles and wants me to bring them to him. I needed to step out of the boat before I could walk on the water. Because of this, I have stopped holding things back from God and I have given them all to him.

            On Thursday, I continued to pray to God not only about my prayer requests and my praises, but for him to change me from the inside out. That was probably the biggest thing that impacted my life from this whole exercise. It taught me that I can and should pray for God to continue to change me every day. I have always been the one striving to change myself but after this exercise I have realized that God can do that as well. Yes, I should be striving after him and changing my character to be more like him but I can’t do it all on my own. I need God to change me and I need to pray for him to do it for me on a daily basis.

            Friday was a great day because I did my prayer time after I had finished school so I was much more relaxed. I was thanking God for the health that he gave my grandmother as she was able to go back home the night before. In addition, I was showing gratitude to God for helping me survive another week of school. I find that Fridays have next to no prayer requests and quite a few praises. God must like Fridays!!!

After doing this exercise for a week, I really felt like I learned a lot about prayer. I had never had a time where I singularly focused on prayer and after this time I knew that is was a great benefit for me. I learned that God will give you peace through prayer, that if I give everything that I am to God through prayer than I am not hampering God’s help, and I realized that I needed to keep praying for God to change me from the inside out. Also, I prayed before the times of desperation and it felt so good to do that. I know that I will keep all the lessons I learned in this exercise close to my heart.”     

Growing in God (Part 1)

So I don’t know about you guys but right now I feel very weary. It’s been a draining semester and after a few tiring days I really feel like I’ve hit the wall.  Its days like this that I remember that I have the Lord my God on my side, and he will give me the strength I need to endure. I know who he has created me to be and I know that I am carrying out his will. Plus I’m being the person who he wants to be. However, the race doesn’t go to the swift; it goes to those who run the entire course. The essential point that I am going to approach in the next few blogs is growing in Christ. So how do we stay close to God and keep that center of peace?

The first part of staying close to God is reading your Bible in an intentional matter every day. Studying your Bible isn’t just reading it; it is searching deeper and deeper in the text to build a strong relationship with God. I can admit; it seems so hard sometimes to remember to read my Bible. Plus when I read it I am so tempted (and sometimes do) just skim through it really fast. The fact of the matter is that when I purposefully read through the Bible to get closer to Christ… it becomes more alive to me. The words that I read become more and more important to me and I become more and more impacted by them. I was reading through the Psalms a few days ago (They are amazing) and I just really felt the power of the words. This is what I read.

“May the glory of the Lord endure forever; may the Lord rejoice in his works… I will sing to the Lord all my life; I will sing praise to my God as long as I live. May my meditation be pleasing to him, as I rejoice in the Lord.” Proverbs 104:31, 33-34

Another passage that I just reread really inspires me (and many of you have read it) is Proverbs 3:5-6. “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.”

            If you just tread over those words really quickly then you won’t really pick up anything; however, if you really reflect on the significance of each word you realize how dynamic these passages are. Another way of studying the Bible is simply just to read through the passage and then stop and think about each individual verse one by one. As it says in Hebrews 4:12, “For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.” It isn’t a question of whether God’s Word will shape you; it’s a question of are you going to put in the effort to make that possible. Also, this needs to be done every day. It doesn’t have to be a whole lot of time, but enough that you actually understand what you are reading. On some days where you are really busy, it’s okay just to read straight through the passage. Ideally, you do want to have that time of reflection but sometimes it’s just not possible. I understand people are busy; however, I feel that if I have that time of reflection my busy days go so much better!

            Another thing is that while the Bible should be the overwhelming majority of the spiritual content you read, reading something else about Christianity at the same time is always a good idea as well. For example, right now I am reading a book many of you have gotten your hands on (and if you haven’t you really should) called “not a fan.” by Kyle Idleman. He is the pastor of the fifth largest church in America, but the size of his church doesn’t matter. The content that he has written in this book is absolutely amazing. It brings such great clarity to the Christian faith and it asks you rock-solid questions that make you think really hard about what you believe. I would highly suggest it to anybody… its purpose is, “Becoming a completely committed follower of Jesus” and it meets that expectation perfectly. There are so many other books you can read to build your faith and I would highly suggest it. These books give you another view in which you can build your faith. Some of the words from authors like C.S. Lewis, Max Lucado, Lee Strobel and others are grounded in the Gospel and bring about such great growth in your faith.

            In this series, I’m going to cover multiple areas of how you grow in faith but I really felt like reading the Bible and additional materials would be a great way to start. As I stated earlier, don’t just read the passage and then come away with nothing. Dive deep into the text, understand it, reflect on it and let it change your life. The Bible is truly dynamic; it is where we can read God’s direct message to you and me. Treat it that way 🙂 can’t wait to see where the series is going to go. Really excited to be hitting this topic 😀

 

P.S. Long-time readers… I probably haven’t spoken to you guys in forever haha! Life is going absolutely fantastic here at college. I am really busy but I’m having a great time and am really enjoying the people and events here. Thus why this blog is a little shorter than usual… I think I’m going to go shorter though. I feel like my previous writing was maybe a bit too long and with shorter posts it will keep your attention better. Plus my rambling will be kept to minimum lol. Anyways, hope life is going well for you guys!

Battle Cry

A lot of times Christians take a lackadaisical approach to the real spiritual war we are in. Our own salvation is in Jesus Christ but there’s so much in this than just us. There are other people’s lives at stake… we just don’t think about the fate of non-Christians we love. I hate to break it to you… but they’re going to hell. Good people go to hell. What I mean by that is if somebody lives a good life and never accepts Jesus… they’re hosed. I like to use the analogy of a boomerang. Somebody will reach out and do as much good as they do to save their own life but no matter how much they do the boomerang will always come back to them. You can’t do it on your own… you need God. But that’s not what this is about. This about witnessing to those who haven’t heard this news and I will use the chorus from the song “Battle Cry” by Skillet to expound on this topic.

I believe we can’t lose

This is a huge part of the witnessing process… realize that God has already won the war. Satan cannot reverse that however much he tries and his fight is doomed. That doesn’t mean that we can relax because the individual battles are still in our hands. Satan tries to get into our heads and puts fear into our hearts. Don’t listen to him… whatever he says we can’t lose!!!

Even mountains will move

When God leads us to do something and we think that all the odds are stacked against us… there is still a way to achieve the goal he has put in our hearts. If we follow God with all of our heart mountains will move. Whatever God wants to be done will be done… we just need to believe that he will move those mountains for us.

It’s our faith, it’s our life

A huge part of witnessing isn’t reaching out to the lost; it’s building your own faith. Thankfully, I’ve had people in my life that do that for me on a constant basis. From my best friends, to my mentors, to the people at my private Christian university right now… my faith has been built up. Especially at this university, I love how my faith is challenged and I want to know more about God. Additionally, this is your life. Don’t waste the time that God has given you to save the lost. He has given you everything you need… you just need to take the initiative and incorporate him into your life. Then you can reach out to the lost and help bring them to God 🙂

   
This is our battle cry

Witnessing to non-believers is a huge call for us as Christians. It’s honestly a battle cry because when we are witnessing we are grappling with demonic forces… it’s not something to be taken lightly. We are living for God and in carrying out his will he is helping us fight against Satan. This is a battle; therefore, it needs a battle cry that comes from us and that encourages us as we fight the enemy.

They can’t take us down

That’s the point… no matter what happens we can’t be stopped. I’ve honestly come to this conclusion… dying for Jesus is an absolute honor. If I was killed because I was spreading my Christian beliefs I would win. It’s something that I’ve struggled with but now I can say it with absolute truth… I am NOT afraid to die for my faith. Nobody can take me down.

 
If we stand our ground

We have everything… we just need to have the guts to stand our ground and not budge a single inch. God calls us to be warriors for him and that means to stand our ground for him.

If we live, if we die

You see; if we live and continue to preach about Christianity we win. If we are killed because of our refusal to stop spreading God’s word we win. Why? Because we are finally rid of this fallen world where sin abounds and we decay every day. Then we get to see God face-to-face. Either option sounds wonderful to me!

We will shout out our battle cry

We don’t need to be quiet about our faith. Shout out to the whole world what God has done for you and do it all of your days. We won’t keep the life-changing effects of Jesus Christ to ourselves… we will spread it across the whole globe. Whether you’re a missionary, doctor, banker, athlete, student etc. there are chances in your life to witness about Jesus Christ. So let that battle cry shout out in everything you do and let it spread to others!!!

 

This is why I believe God calls us to battle. So men, don’t be boys. Be real warriors that are seeking God’s will and fighting for his kingdom. Women, don’t be girls, strive for God! We can’t lose so there is no reason to be tentative… God will move those mountains in your life. He will move in your life and do things you never could’ve imagined. So don’t be afraid… use that battle cry to bring glory to God and everything he has done!!!!!!!!!!!

 

P.S. 6 weeks of college are in the book. The workload is getting higher as I head toward mid-terms but I’ve had so much fun here. So many good times!!!!!

Life isn’t Picture Perfect… but that’s fine!

I’ve always wanted my life to be picture perfect. I’ve always to be the model person that everybody enjoys and that is respected by all. I’ve always wanted to be that person who has their life all together and people come to for advice. I’ve always wanted to be the absolute best person that I can be and I strive so hard to get there… but sometimes that causes me to put myself down when I see people better than me. Striving for perfection is a great goal but it causes me to forget what my true motive is and can lead me off track. I get so caught up in trying to be perfect that I forget that God didn’t make me to be perfect. He made me to carry out his will and I can do everything he has set me up for.

                However, I’ve figured out that life isn’t about being perfect and fitting in. Life is about embracing who God made you to be and using the journey of life to become more like God.  I’ve learned that whatever it looks like no one has their life completely together. That’s how they look on the outside but everyone has something that they are struggling with. Some of us have bigger problems and some of us have smaller problems. Either way, I’ve really just gotten used to my life even though it has struggles. A lot of people tend to focus on the problems of their life but I’ve learned that the blessings of my life FAR outweigh the problems. Even when it seems like my blessings are few I just take time to remember everything that I have. I have a wonderful family, two awesome parents, a great circle of close friends, an amazing amount of cool friends, I’m pretty smart, I’ve always been able to do well in athletics… it all outweighs whatever negatives come my way. I’ve learned that when you have these problems in life you need to depend on God/close friends and you will make it through. The storm comes through but the joy comes when it is finished and gone!

                Why am I talking about this? That’s a great question and I’m glad I asked myself 😉 I’m bringing this up because it’s been something I have always struggled with. Sometimes it’s really challenged the core of who I am and caused me to not be myself. BE YOURSELF!!! Don’t let anyone or anything make you think that you aren’t good enough. Often this is a way of Satan to get in your head and capitalize on your insecurities. You are never going to be perfect… so don’t worry about it. Just try to be the best person you can be and if you fail don’t dwell on it. Just pick yourself back up, dust yourself off and keep on going.

                I also bring this up because I know that I’m not the only one who is haunted by bad decisions you have made. I had something that I’ve been holding onto for years and I really wouldn’t forgive myself for what I had done. Basically, at the time, I wasn’t happy with who I was and as a result I made a few bad decisions that almost had extremely bad consequences. It was totally outside of God’s plan and I looking back I still can’t believe that I made those decisions. Today at church there was a time of reflection (which is at the end of every service) and God just hammered this home on me. He told me that I needed to completely forgive myself for what I had done and that while it wasn’t a good thing it all fit into his big plan. So I finally let it go… after all these years… and it felt like I just had a huge weight lifted off my shoulders 🙂 … it was wonderful.

                So I guess in conclusion just embrace who you are and don’t let your past effect your present. God made you exactly who you are and you don’t need to “have it all together” or “be perfect” or be like anyone else. Just be who God made you to be 😀

 

P.S. Thank you for reading! Your time spent looking at my blog is really appreciated and I hope you enjoyed it! For those at home: college life is going absolutely fantastic so far! I am having a great time making new friends, doing debate, getting good grades and just overall enjoying the college experience.   

Equilibrium: We All Have a Purpose

So I watched this movie called Equilibrium and it made me think about a few things. Basically, this movie was about a group of people who controlled the population after a 3^rd World War. The population was taught to have no feeling and took chemicals in order to help them not feel. This was so there was no war and that there was complete peace. Those who disobeyed and kept stuff that made them feel were dealt with by the police and Special Forces. One of special force men started to try to figure out how this feeling stuff worked (because he didn’t feel) and ended up getting pulled into it. All in all, it was a really good movie and I came away with some points. God didn’t make us to be robots but humans with a purpose, don’t let your emotion cloud your judgement and always find your calling in Christ.  

Firstly, thank God we aren’t robots and that we have a purpose!!! I saw the people who lived life with no feeling and I certainly would not want to live life like they were. It reminds me how lucky I am to be chosen and called by God for the tasks that he has pre-ordained for me. I think God has taught me not to be a passive participant in life but to embrace it fully. I want to live life with my heart open, a smile on my face and I want to be constantly striving to carry out God’s will. Yes, it is harder. Yes, with an open heart you can get hurt… but that’s the beauty of it all. You are holding nothing back and you won’t get cheated in life. I call it the miracle of the moment… you can’t change the past or the future… the only moment you can change is now. So you only have a short window… and I don’t know about you guys but I really want to make the most of it! With God’s help you will be able to withstand the heartache, the tough moments… he is always there. You can pray to him 24/7 and ask for guidance and comfort. He will deliver… he never fails… and with his help you will be able to rejoice in the high points. I guess what I’m trying to say is that living life wholly for God includes keeping your heart open and making the most of the moments that he gives you 🙂

However, there is a curse that comes along with making our own choices… it’s called sin. As the Bible says the heart is deceitfully wicked and that means our natural choice is to pick what is wrong. In the movie, the main character eventually becomes a person who can feel but the problem is that he lets his rage go OUT OF CONTROL. In the last twenty minutes of the movie he successfully kills a ton of soldiers and overthrows the government. Yes, it only takes him twenty minutes in movie time lol… he went REALLY pro!!! The action gets so intense and you can see in his eyes that his judgment is totally clouded. Was he doing the right thing? Debatable… yes he was taking down a horrible government that murdered so many civilians but at the same time he was murdering people to bring down the government. Anyways, my point is that we can let our emotion get in front of what God wants us to do and cause us to sin against him. When we sin; we are essentially turning away from God and that isn’t good. So always do your best to keep God in front of your heart’s feeling because he is always looking out for your good!

The movie also shows that we always be searching for our calling if we don’t trust God. The main character… who btw was played by Christian Bale who did an AMAZING job… was searching for what it meant to feel. He was attempting to figure out what was the point of existence. In the end, the movie kinda leaves you hanging in that perspective. Bale simply kills the top government officials, watches the freedom fighters finish the takeover, and that’s how the movie ends. It never showed that he found his purpose, he found who he really was… I would’ve liked to see a sequel just for that perspective specifically. The point is that he never truly found his calling and if there was a sequel we would have been watching him epicly struggle to figure out who he was. We don’t need to worry about that… our true identity IS in Christ and no other place. Whenever you are tempted to move away from God just remember that he is the one who is holding you together. He is your anchor… just always find your calling in Him 🙂

Hope this was good… love my readers! You guys da best yea yea!!!!!!!!

Breaking the Demons That are Inside

When you feel my heat
Look into my eyes
It’s where my demons hide
It’s where my demons hide
Don’t get too close
It’s dark inside
It’s where my demons hide
It’s where my demons hide~ “Demons” Imagine Dragons

 

So I know it’s unconventional to start with the lyrics from a secular song but this really got me thinking because we all do this thing as Christians or just as people. All of us look great on the outside no matter what’s going on but we all have different types of “demons” inside our soul. Only a few people know about our personal demons and sometimes we just bottle them up deep inside us. We’re all afraid to let people inside and see the demons… plus we just can’t quite cure them either.

The problem with most people is that they cave in to their demons. They just accept the fact that they are “cursed” with them and they can’t do anything about it. These demons pull them down and prevent the people from living freely for God. People just aren’t willing to put in a proactive effort to rid themselves of the demons. I’m totally not pointing fingers… I’m just as guilty as anyone else. I know my demons and while I’ve gotten rid of some of them there are others that I have let sit. The demons that say no matter how much I achieve in life I will never be good enough (or inadequacy) … that’s something I’ve struggled with all my life. The demons that make me become self-centered and only focus on myself. Plus so many more. I know FOR A FACT that I’m not the only person who struggles with these.

The thing is that we have to rely on the strength of God to defeat the demons in our soul. We can’t take on our demons alone… because that’s how God made us. We are really such fragile human beings when you think hard about it and the tiniest things can bring us down. Something can start like a tiny fire in the woods but if it’s not taken care of it lights the whole forest on fire. I find it funny how the human race (including myself) can be so proud of ourselves yet so fallible to errors at the same time. Look at the world today… everyone is making so many mistakes. Looking at history… entire empires have crumbled over a tiny mistake that just kept getting bigger and bigger before it consumed the whole thing.

We need God to fill that void for us because all we have to offer him is a broken person. I honestly can’t say that I can offer anything to God that he doesn’t already have. He has everything… I come to him because he can make me whole again. God can make me into something that I could never attain with my own strength. He can help us fight the demons that try to bring us down because God wants us so much. He knows you better than you even know yourself and if you trust him he will move mountains with you. In him you will find the strength to break through the struggles of life and cast off the demons that hold you down. He knows where those demons hide and he will put people in your life that will help you cast off your demons. I know that he has definitely put people in my life that show me (whether unintentionally or intentionally) how I can shake free of demons. I can’t count the times where I was ready to just leave the demon be… and at the last second a friend just said something that gave me what I needed to defeat the enemy. In addition, my parents have helped me out as well by showing me that I really am successful and that I want to strive for excellence because I have high goals not because I’m inadequate. My two best friends never realize how much they (mostly) unintentionally and sometimes intentionally say exactly what I need to hear. They just are always there for me and help me through my struggles. They don’t know how much they mean to me 🙂 In addition, God has saved me so many times as well… through the reading of his word, through prayer… he has lead me through heartbreak and pain. He has been with me on the sunny days and on the rainy days. I’ve been so far in life and experienced so much… yet I’ve only lived 18 years on earth haha. Kinda weird to think I still have so far to go!!!

I just know that my best days are the ones when I’ve surrendered my soul to God and he has helped me to fight those demons inside. This song by Imagine Dragons is saying don’t get too close to the demons but we Christians need to take the opposite course. We can’t let those demons pull us down because that prevents us from fully reaching the potential that we have in Christ. We need to put our trust in God, be committed to fighting those demons, and let him do the rest. I love it when I surrender to God… it just feels so wonderful 🙂

 

P.S. Yea, I finished another blog… I hope God spoke to you through it!

Hope

So I’ve literally been trying to write this for somewhere around three weeks now and I haven’t blogged in forever… I’m sorry. My life has been insane! I moved into my dorm and completed my first week of college!!! Anyways, like I said, I wanted to delve into a topic that all of us have a key interest in. Hope is something that God has placed inside us all… so let’s break it down.
The first thing to realize about hope is that there are two different kinds of hope. There is the hope for something that we can’t control and the kind of hope that we can control. For example; I can hope that the Seattle Seahawks win the Super Bowl. This would be the hope without action because I don’t play on the Seahawks and I can’t do anything about the situation. On the other hand, if I hoped that my intramural flag football team would win the university championship (which is gonna happen because we’re already having workouts… plus I’m good 😉 ) that is hope with action because I can do something about that. The reason why I break these two apart is because we tend to let God have more control of the ones that we can’t control. Then when it comes to the things we can control… that’s where we try to forget about God and (intentionally or unintentionally) squeeze him out. While, in the meantime “uncontrollable” hope (as I call it) is still important but I will focus more on the “controllable hope. This is the area we have a problem giving to God and usually have the most problems in.
So what does the Bible say about hope? Well, my favorite verse on hope is 1 Corinthians 2:9, “No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love him.” No matter how much we hope for something and no matter how much effort we put into it… the result is never fully in our hands. We may think we have control of a circumstance and that we can make what we hope reality. The truth is that there are so many variables to a situation we never have control. Never. That’s where we turn to God… because he knows all the variables. He knows your most anxious thoughts. He knows all the different stuff that can happen and he knows what is best for you. Now don’t think I’m saying don’t hope for things. Some of the greatest things in life are the ones you hope, dream and fight for. It is okay to hope for them… the key is not to let that hope blind you and separate you from the path on which God is leading you. Let God lead your hopes… because he knows what is best for you.
I’m not going to write a long blog describing on how to let God lead you. At least not today lol. It’s simple… just pray and listen to him. At this point just take a few minutes to bask in God’s presence and just trust that he knows what he is doing 🙂

I know I promised more stuff… it’s just been coming along slowly. Thank you to my blog readers who have patiently been waiting for more stuff. I appreciate it 🙂

At my Weakest I am my Strongest

People may say this is crazy, but I believe we are at our strongest point when we are at our weakest. You may ask why this is the case. The reason I hold on to this is because God moves the most in our lives when we desperately need him and decide to let go of what we want. When you let God take control you are letting the maker of the universe (the one who made you!) take the reins. Personally, it took me 17 years of my 18 years of life to figure this out haha! Since a missions trip I went on last summer, I have been having the best times of my life. I just take every day for what it is- another day to live for the glory of God and spread his word. Each moment is so precious and when you try to do it all yourself…well… you end up wasting a ton of time. And making mistakes. And feeling empty. Don’t waste that time; let God take control. When you let God take control of every facet of your life and take yourself out of the driver’s seat you will feel at peace. Of course you’re going to make mistakes and try to take back the reins sometimes… that’s because our heart is deceitfully wicked above all things as the Bible says. It is wicked for us to try to take God out of the equation and why would we? He can do so much in our lives and just transform us into people more like him.

 

God will work through you when you are weak. For me; I know this last week was an example of this. I work as a camp counselor and I was doing an overnight camp up in the mountains. Two of the boys in my group were the two most disrespectful 13 year-olds I have ever met. So the first three days were me trying to hold a solid line for discipline but at the same time attempting to have fun with the boys. Wednesday evening we had cabin devotions, I had just disciplined the boys, and was at the end of my rope. I honestly just cried out to God and said “Lord I need you now. Please help me because right now I am so drained and have no idea what I should do besides starting with something in Nehemiah.” Did God show up? You bet he did! He just put all these words into my mouth that weren’t mine and I talked for about 30 minutes straight. I jumped from Nehemiah to somewhere in the New Testament, to Proverbs, to Job, to my testimony and ended with the woman at the well. I can take no credit for what I said then… it was all him. At the beginning of devos I had the two naughty kids with pillows over their head, a few more not really paying attention, and just overall nobody really cares about devotions. By the end, I had every kid’s eyes riveted on me just gobbling up everything God was saying through me. It amazing to feel the strength that God gives us when we are weak.

 

It’s just amazing to watch what God can do. When you follow him that’s when the best things happen. One of the things I love to do is spiritual treasure hunts… you basically just go out in public and pray for people. You pray for healing of the mind and soul. I have seen people healed on the spot in both of these areas. It just takes such a leap of faith to start and it’s still really scary. I’ve been flipped off by people before… but I take it as a sign of persecution. I got persecuted for my Lord- that’s freakin’ awesome!!! Plus you never know when you plant a seed inside of someone that the next person will come and harvest.

 

As a camp counselor I get to see a lot of people transformed in just one week and I am continually changing as well. It’s also fantastic to hear the experiences of my friends at other camps… God is moving this summer and I pray everyone holds on to what they learned at camp this summer. Don’t let it be a mountain peak experience that you forget about… don’t forgot it. Hold onto what God has done and continue to let him change you. The word of the Lord is like a double-edged sword that pierces to bone and marrow. It goes to the heart.  At the only full week of teen camp at my camp a speaker named Brett Hollis really came out and challenged us all. After every chapel there was weeping, repenting, healing… it was absolutely insane. Sometimes it went on for an hour. At the campfire night me and some of the other counselors shared our testimonies… but told parts that we had never told anyone (or only a few people) before. There was a girl that had been legally blind in one eye all her life and the Lord let her see for one night. I loved the teens’ awe at what God did that week… I was like aww yea that’s the God we serve!!! It was really sweet for me just to relax and simply bask in God’s presence. I brought a few kids to the Lord that week and prayed with other kids about their situations. It just has been a blessing to be given this opportunity every week. My prayer skills have gotten better over the last month or so and while it doesn’t matter how great your skills are it still has been a good thing. Through his camp experience I continue to see every day that I can’t do much on my own. I am a strong person… mentally, physically, academically etc. like I’m one of those people who know that they have a bright future ahead of them and all that. God has given me all these gifts though and everything that I do is for him. He knows the plans he has for me and I just let him take the driver’s seat.  

 

People say that those who don’t control their life are weak… but that’s totally not true. I don’t control my life and I’m stronger than I ever have been. Jesus reigns in me and decides to use me to further his kingdom. I enjoy that a lot. I’ve been having the time of my life the last year or so. I mean it has had its hard points but God has helped me through those. I just have this joy in my heart and I can’t wait for everyday because I love living life 😀

P.S. About 2 ½ weeks and I’m headed to college. It feels so weird to be buying college books but that’s where I am right now. Can’t wait!!!   

True Love

What’s true love? True love is always being there for those you love; ready to drop whatever is going on to help them out. True love is being patient with someone during their rough times and trying to help them find their way. True love is not being proud and allowing other people’s opinions to have the same level as your own. True love is allowing your hopes and ambitions to be put down in order that someone else’s might be raised up. True love is making sacrifices for those you love. True love is not being envious of someone’s social level or how many friends they have. True love is taking a friend or friends out just to have fun whether or not you have a busy schedule. True love is treating someone the way God would treat them. True love is realizing your mistakes and doing the best of your ability to erase those wrongs. True love is seeing something in this world that is wrong and doing whatever it takes to fix it. True love is putting the team before yourself and the team’s goals in front of yours.  True love is completely forgiving other people for their mistakes and not holding anything against them. True love is holding nothing back in your life. True love tells the truth even if it’s hard. True love finds a way to heal and restore the brokenhearted. True Love= God … and he is the only thing we need 🙂

 

P.S. Graduation tomorrow, SOO excited!