March 18th, 2013… Life’s Direction

Life is a joy. On the other hand life is tough. There’s no way of going around it. No matter how many blessings that are scattered across your roadway through life there are always a lot of stuff that brings you to tears. If I had to count the times I cried this senior year I would literally be counting forever lol. Of course some of those were for joy, but most of them were because I just felt like everything was falling apart. With my experience in life I’ve discovered that the basic key when it comes to life is your direction. No matter what is happening in your life something you should always be paying attention to this key area. In the wide terms, where are you going? Are you going in a general direction that pleases your Heavenly father, who sacrificed everything for you, or are you drifting away from his grace? Obviously, none of us can completely go in a perfect direction. I would be the first to admit that I’m a flawed person like everyone else on the earth lol. I am very impatient, sometimes lazy and sometimes can really get ticked off if someone does enough to make me upset. So this is all in a general sense; it’s a direction we want to keep following.

The first thing is don’t be afraid to move the direction of your life according to the will of the Holy Spirit because God has control of everything last time I checked ;)

“The Lord of Heaven’s Armies has spoken—who can change his plans?
When his hand is raised,who can stop him?”
Isaiah 14:27

Basically, if you know in your heart that the Holy Spirit is telling you to go one way, GO THAT WAY!! There are so many things that we don’t feel like giving up. One of the hardest things I had to do was give up playing high school soccer this spring. I had been training harder than anyone else trying out for the team and felt like I was hitting my stride at just the perfect time. About two weeks before the tryouts God clearly told me you’re not playing high school soccer. I will admit, I wasted a few nights of my life trying to argue with God. It didn’t work haha. Now, a month later, I know (for one) my grades would’ve slipped if I had been playing soccer the last month or so plus I feel like God has something he wants me to do with the spare time I now have. Can’t wait to see what it is! That whole example just is a personal example of how I realized that the direction of my life needed to be changed according to God’s plans. Like I said before, please don’t think I’m setting myself up as a perfect Christian. I have had many times where I haven’t done what God said and it’s come back to bite me. So I’ve had experience on both sides of the coin. Just remember God is out there and he CARES about you SO much. No one in the universe wants you to be in a personal relationship with him more than God does and no one is more crazy in love with you than Him! Always remember God is in complete control of the situation and He wants what is best for you.

Another piece of the puzzle is you making the personal choice to keep a loose grip on your life and let God take control. It’s a choice that we all have to come to grips with at some point and it inevitably changes our lives because it is such an amazing decision. It is so easy to keep a death grip on your life and try to control everything. I mean sometimes I really do feel like the only person I can trust in the world IS myself, but God is slowly working on my heart and showing me that I can do nothing compared to what he can do. Just let go of it all!

Finally, you gotta make the effort to channel your life toward God. There are so many distractions in life and so many things that make us want to “forget” God for just a few moments. FIGHT through those moments with everything you have because those moments are the ones that determine the direction of your life. Life is made up of a lot of little steps, so every decision you make is important. God controls the direction of your life, but you make the decision whether to strive for the glory of God or just to stick in the norm. As one who sat in the norm for WAY too long, I think the answer is easy. Go big for God, shine so that the direction of your life is obvious to everyone that you know. Always be pushing to know God better because that will overflow into the rest of your life.

Just make a promise to God that you will make the direction of your life honoring to him your whole life. I got a long way to go. I’m only a senior in high school and I don’t know where in the world my life is going. But that’s the fun part. I get to sit back and see what God is going to do! I promise that I will do everything in my power to do everything that I can to honor my Lord the rest of my life. Anyone else in on this too?

I’ll end it with a beastly scripture. I love it when God knocks it out of the ballpark!

And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28


Life isn’t Picture Perfect… but that’s fine!

I’ve always wanted my life to be picture perfect. I’ve always to be the model person that everybody enjoys and that is respected by all. I’ve always wanted to be that person who has their life all together and people come to for advice. I’ve always wanted to be the absolute best person that I can be and I strive so hard to get there… but sometimes that causes me to put myself down when I see people better than me. Striving for perfection is a great goal but it causes me to forget what my true motive is and can lead me off track. I get so caught up in trying to be perfect that I forget that God didn’t make me to be perfect. He made me to carry out his will and I can do everything he has set me up for.

                However, I’ve figured out that life isn’t about being perfect and fitting in. Life is about embracing who God made you to be and using the journey of life to become more like God.  I’ve learned that whatever it looks like no one has their life completely together. That’s how they look on the outside but everyone has something that they are struggling with. Some of us have bigger problems and some of us have smaller problems. Either way, I’ve really just gotten used to my life even though it has struggles. A lot of people tend to focus on the problems of their life but I’ve learned that the blessings of my life FAR outweigh the problems. Even when it seems like my blessings are few I just take time to remember everything that I have. I have a wonderful family, two awesome parents, a great circle of close friends, an amazing amount of cool friends, I’m pretty smart, I’ve always been able to do well in athletics… it all outweighs whatever negatives come my way. I’ve learned that when you have these problems in life you need to depend on God/close friends and you will make it through. The storm comes through but the joy comes when it is finished and gone!

                Why am I talking about this? That’s a great question and I’m glad I asked myself 😉 I’m bringing this up because it’s been something I have always struggled with. Sometimes it’s really challenged the core of who I am and caused me to not be myself. BE YOURSELF!!! Don’t let anyone or anything make you think that you aren’t good enough. Often this is a way of Satan to get in your head and capitalize on your insecurities. You are never going to be perfect… so don’t worry about it. Just try to be the best person you can be and if you fail don’t dwell on it. Just pick yourself back up, dust yourself off and keep on going.

                I also bring this up because I know that I’m not the only one who is haunted by bad decisions you have made. I had something that I’ve been holding onto for years and I really wouldn’t forgive myself for what I had done. Basically, at the time, I wasn’t happy with who I was and as a result I made a few bad decisions that almost had extremely bad consequences. It was totally outside of God’s plan and I looking back I still can’t believe that I made those decisions. Today at church there was a time of reflection (which is at the end of every service) and God just hammered this home on me. He told me that I needed to completely forgive myself for what I had done and that while it wasn’t a good thing it all fit into his big plan. So I finally let it go… after all these years… and it felt like I just had a huge weight lifted off my shoulders 🙂 … it was wonderful.

                So I guess in conclusion just embrace who you are and don’t let your past effect your present. God made you exactly who you are and you don’t need to “have it all together” or “be perfect” or be like anyone else. Just be who God made you to be 😀


P.S. Thank you for reading! Your time spent looking at my blog is really appreciated and I hope you enjoyed it! For those at home: college life is going absolutely fantastic so far! I am having a great time making new friends, doing debate, getting good grades and just overall enjoying the college experience.   

Equilibrium: We All Have a Purpose

So I watched this movie called Equilibrium and it made me think about a few things. Basically, this movie was about a group of people who controlled the population after a 3rd World War. The population was taught to have no feeling and took chemicals in order to help them not feel. This was so there was no war and that there was complete peace. Those who disobeyed and kept stuff that made them feel were dealt with by the police and Special Forces. One of special force men started to try to figure out how this feeling stuff worked (because he didn’t feel) and ended up getting pulled into it. All in all, it was a really good movie and I came away with some points. God didn’t make us to be robots but humans with a purpose, don’t let your emotion cloud your judgement and always find your calling in Christ.  

Firstly, thank God we aren’t robots and that we have a purpose!!! I saw the people who lived life with no feeling and I certainly would not want to live life like they were. It reminds me how lucky I am to be chosen and called by God for the tasks that he has pre-ordained for me. I think God has taught me not to be a passive participant in life but to embrace it fully. I want to live life with my heart open, a smile on my face and I want to be constantly striving to carry out God’s will. Yes, it is harder. Yes, with an open heart you can get hurt… but that’s the beauty of it all. You are holding nothing back and you won’t get cheated in life. I call it the miracle of the moment… you can’t change the past or the future… the only moment you can change is now. So you only have a short window… and I don’t know about you guys but I really want to make the most of it! With God’s help you will be able to withstand the heartache, the tough moments… he is always there. You can pray to him 24/7 and ask for guidance and comfort. He will deliver… he never fails… and with his help you will be able to rejoice in the high points. I guess what I’m trying to say is that living life wholly for God includes keeping your heart open and making the most of the moments that he gives you 🙂

However, there is a curse that comes along with making our own choices… it’s called sin. As the Bible says the heart is deceitfully wicked and that means our natural choice is to pick what is wrong. In the movie, the main character eventually becomes a person who can feel but the problem is that he lets his rage go OUT OF CONTROL. In the last twenty minutes of the movie he successfully kills a ton of soldiers and overthrows the government. Yes, it only takes him twenty minutes in movie time lol… he went REALLY pro!!! The action gets so intense and you can see in his eyes that his judgment is totally clouded. Was he doing the right thing? Debatable… yes he was taking down a horrible government that murdered so many civilians but at the same time he was murdering people to bring down the government. Anyways, my point is that we can let our emotion get in front of what God wants us to do and cause us to sin against him. When we sin; we are essentially turning away from God and that isn’t good. So always do your best to keep God in front of your heart’s feeling because he is always looking out for your good!

The movie also shows that we always be searching for our calling if we don’t trust God. The main character… who btw was played by Christian Bale who did an AMAZING job… was searching for what it meant to feel. He was attempting to figure out what was the point of existence. In the end, the movie kinda leaves you hanging in that perspective. Bale simply kills the top government officials, watches the freedom fighters finish the takeover, and that’s how the movie ends. It never showed that he found his purpose, he found who he really was… I would’ve liked to see a sequel just for that perspective specifically. The point is that he never truly found his calling and if there was a sequel we would have been watching him epicly struggle to figure out who he was. We don’t need to worry about that… our true identity IS in Christ and no other place. Whenever you are tempted to move away from God just remember that he is the one who is holding you together. He is your anchor… just always find your calling in Him 🙂

Hope this was good… love my readers! You guys da best yea yea!!!!!!!!

Breaking the Demons That are Inside

When you feel my heat
Look into my eyes
It’s where my demons hide
It’s where my demons hide
Don’t get too close
It’s dark inside
It’s where my demons hide
It’s where my demons hide~ “Demons” Imagine Dragons


So I know it’s unconventional to start with the lyrics from a secular song but this really got me thinking because we all do this thing as Christians or just as people. All of us look great on the outside no matter what’s going on but we all have different types of “demons” inside our soul. Only a few people know about our personal demons and sometimes we just bottle them up deep inside us. We’re all afraid to let people inside and see the demons… plus we just can’t quite cure them either.

The problem with most people is that they cave in to their demons. They just accept the fact that they are “cursed” with them and they can’t do anything about it. These demons pull them down and prevent the people from living freely for God. People just aren’t willing to put in a proactive effort to rid themselves of the demons. I’m totally not pointing fingers… I’m just as guilty as anyone else. I know my demons and while I’ve gotten rid of some of them there are others that I have let sit. The demons that say no matter how much I achieve in life I will never be good enough (or inadequacy) … that’s something I’ve struggled with all my life. The demons that make me become self-centered and only focus on myself. Plus so many more. I know FOR A FACT that I’m not the only person who struggles with these.

The thing is that we have to rely on the strength of God to defeat the demons in our soul. We can’t take on our demons alone… because that’s how God made us. We are really such fragile human beings when you think hard about it and the tiniest things can bring us down. Something can start like a tiny fire in the woods but if it’s not taken care of it lights the whole forest on fire. I find it funny how the human race (including myself) can be so proud of ourselves yet so fallible to errors at the same time. Look at the world today… everyone is making so many mistakes. Looking at history… entire empires have crumbled over a tiny mistake that just kept getting bigger and bigger before it consumed the whole thing.

We need God to fill that void for us because all we have to offer him is a broken person. I honestly can’t say that I can offer anything to God that he doesn’t already have. He has everything… I come to him because he can make me whole again. God can make me into something that I could never attain with my own strength. He can help us fight the demons that try to bring us down because God wants us so much. He knows you better than you even know yourself and if you trust him he will move mountains with you. In him you will find the strength to break through the struggles of life and cast off the demons that hold you down. He knows where those demons hide and he will put people in your life that will help you cast off your demons. I know that he has definitely put people in my life that show me (whether unintentionally or intentionally) how I can shake free of demons. I can’t count the times where I was ready to just leave the demon be… and at the last second a friend just said something that gave me what I needed to defeat the enemy. In addition, my parents have helped me out as well by showing me that I really am successful and that I want to strive for excellence because I have high goals not because I’m inadequate. My two best friends never realize how much they (mostly) unintentionally and sometimes intentionally say exactly what I need to hear. They just are always there for me and help me through my struggles. They don’t know how much they mean to me 🙂 In addition, God has saved me so many times as well… through the reading of his word, through prayer… he has lead me through heartbreak and pain. He has been with me on the sunny days and on the rainy days. I’ve been so far in life and experienced so much… yet I’ve only lived 18 years on earth haha. Kinda weird to think I still have so far to go!!!

I just know that my best days are the ones when I’ve surrendered my soul to God and he has helped me to fight those demons inside. This song by Imagine Dragons is saying don’t get too close to the demons but we Christians need to take the opposite course. We can’t let those demons pull us down because that prevents us from fully reaching the potential that we have in Christ. We need to put our trust in God, be committed to fighting those demons, and let him do the rest. I love it when I surrender to God… it just feels so wonderful 🙂


P.S. Yea, I finished another blog… I hope God spoke to you through it!